I was cradling my coffee in one hand and refreshing my emails with the other. “I think my thumb is getting a cramp. Or repetitive strain injury. Either one.” “Stop checking… you wanted to leave anyway!” Boyfriend rolled his eyes at me. “You’re right. I wish they would just hurry up and email me though; … Continue reading BE CAREFUL WHAT YOU WISH FOR?
“Stop touching your face, Pam.” Boyfriend tutted at me as we were waiting for the lifts. I internally eye-rolled at him, and my tone of voice said just as much. “I KNOW”. “Well, why do you keep doing it then?” “BECAUSE THE BLOODY FACE MASK THAT WE HAVE BEEN TOLD TO WEAR IS TOO BIG … Continue reading LITTLE FACE ISSUES
Since so many of you have been asking about my favourite skincare products, (JOKES-literally not a single person has ever asked me this but I’m going to show you anyway) my top five favourite products that keep me looking like a functioning human when I feel more like I’ve just finished my 8th round in … Continue reading NO-ONE ASKED BUT I’M TELLING YOU
It’s the third week of quarantine here in Dubai, and we are now on a 24 hour lock down. We don’t have that privilege that they have in the UK, where you’re allowed out once a day for exercise… we can’t even go to the supermarket without obtaining a permit from the police first. Not … Continue reading QUARANTINE DAY… ?
Just like the Sinead O ‘Connor song, It has in fact been (approximately) seven hours and fifteen days, since I: wore mascara did my fake tan wore a socially acceptable outfit I think it’s the longest time in my adult life, where I’ve really let myself ‘go’. Although, as I write it, It doesn’t really summarise the point I’m trying … Continue reading QUARANT-QUEEN
The airport wasn’t even five minutes behind me when I saw the monstrous billboard advertisement by Heineken. Holiday troubles are part of the tradition, enjoy them. Accurate, I told myself as we whizzed on past, weaving through the onslaught of mopeds and scooters. Mario Kart, but with more traffic. But this wasn’t a virtual reality. … Continue reading BALI KNOW ITS
Today marks the tenth day of Christmas, and the first day of opening my advent calendar. I’m sure I’ve mentioned before, that one of the only perks of being an air hostess is that whilst you’re traveling, you amass a backlog of chocolate advent calendar windows to open upon your return. Luckily, that meant that … Continue reading A REALISTIC LETTER TO SANTA
“I think you could write a book. Kind of, an anecdote of ‘Why Men Love Bitches’. You could call it something like, ‘What Not To Say In A Relationship’. A bit like ‘How to Lose a Guy in Ten Days’. Those sort of vibes.”
My mum is my biggest fan. She is my absolute biggest cheerleader. The first person to watch my IG stories (because she somehow worked out that she can receive notifications of when I post anything…) and the first person to message me every single morning when I wake up. But, her being of the Baby … Continue reading MUMS ON FACEBOOK
My friend was chatting to me, but I kept being distracted by the child who was blatantly staring at me. I could see her, out of the corner of my eye, watching me, unblinking, whilst she crammed cake into her mouth with both chunky fists. Just as I was beginning to wonder if I had … Continue reading WELL I GUESS THIS IS GROWING UP
“I love reading your blog Pam.” I hadn’t written one in a while and to be honest I’d been rather lacking inspiration. Maybe because I’d been so happy? Was it easier to write about miserable stuff? ‘Well, if you’ve got any ideas or suggestions for what to write about next, then fire them this way!” … Continue reading WEDDING BELLES & WEDDING FAILS
“And how do you feel?” “Well, Doctor S said that when it kicked in, I’d know… That it would be like finding light in the dark… I am not really sure that I am seeing the whole light yet?” The doctor laughed from the bottom of his belly. “Listen, I wouldn’t quite word it as … Continue reading WHITE GIRLS ON VACATION
Breakups are harder the older you get, and that’s a fact. Not only do you have to endure the heartache that is missing someone who’s been a huge part of your life for a considerable amount of time, but you’re also grieving for all the hopes, dreams and plans that will never come to fruition. … Continue reading DETANGLING THE TANGLES
We were sat on a beautiful big balcony, overlooking the sea but I sat there looking down forlornly at the bubbles in my sparkling water. “Is this rock bottom?” I mumbled quietly to my friend. “I think so…”’ she replied, “But do you know what happens when you reach rock bottom, Pam?” I continued to … Continue reading FRIENDS 4 FAMILY.
“January is going to be our year.” I was Skyping with my overseas bestie a couple of days before Hogmanay (that’s what us Scots call New Years Eve by the way). I thought ahead to my January work pattern and felt a tidal wave of giddy wash over mewhen I thought about the two weeks … Continue reading JANUARY IS THE LONGEST MONTH OF THE YEAR
It’s foolish to deny the want to be popular. On some level, you want to be popular. It’s okay, everybody does. Everyone wants to be liked and actively seeks validation in belonging to a tribe. Denying it is no use; it’s pure evolution. But the fundamental question to women worldwide should be, which tribe do … Continue reading REGINA GEORGES’ VS CADY HERONS’.
And no, I do not mean the song by Haddaway, but you can listen to it here if I’ve put you in the mood for it. “Here, I’ll forward the link to you now, and tell me your score!!!” My flatmate bounded enthusiastically out of the room in search for her phone so she could ping … Continue reading WHAT IS LOVE?
We were at the gym, before breakfast doing fasted cardio in a bid to lose some weight, slogging it out on the treadmill that overlooked the swimming pool when I felt a familiar lurch. She was right in our line of sight; all tanned, long dark hair, body like a fitness model, petite stature, and … Continue reading FOR ANY GIRL WHO’S NOT FELT ENOUGH
I’ve sat here, in front of my laptop now for forty five minutes. If that’s not a testament to the very subject that I’m trying to write about, then I don’t know what is.
I got an anonymous comment on one of my blogposts. (To see the post in question, click here). Firstly, I am clearly not excelling at this whole blogger-thing – because it must have lay there unnoticed for quite some time, (note to self, must read and pay attention to inbox more frequently), and secondly, I then … Continue reading (NOT SO) INDEPENDANT LADY
T H I R T Y. Three weeks. Twenty-one days… ’til I am thirty. Let’s talk about turning thirty.
I wrote a blog post on the types of men you find in Dubai following a conversation with my friend over a You Tube video which categorises men into four types, but then, the more I thought about it, I realised that for every type of man in Dubai, there are just as many different … Continue reading BUT GIRLS DON’T EITHER
My friend just sent me a YouTube video of a Derek Hart theory which states that there are four types of man, slotting categorically under the following headings: boy player confused man good man After I watched it, (you can watch it too by clicking here) I found myself researching other articles about different types … Continue reading MEN DON’T FIT INTO NEAT LITTLE BOXES
In the hook up culture of today’s millennial generation, there is an abundance of apps that make causal encounters easier than ever before, including Tinder, Bumble and Happ’n to name a few, but in a world where one night stands are a mere click away and sex is pretty much readily available, the flip side … Continue reading MILLENNIAL MONOGAMY
Sat on the sofa eating Pad Thai and half watching Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, my good friend (who’s never short of verbal ammunition for my blog) was talking to me about newly acquired boyfriends. To be more specific, she was talking about a mutual colleague of ours who recently coupled up, and has already … Continue reading IS HE MY BOYFRIEND?
Have you ever seen the film, ‘Just Friends?, where Ryan Reynolds explains the ‘friend zone’, “The ‘friend zone’ is like the penalty box of dating, only you can never get out. Once a girl decides you’re her ‘friend,’ it’s game over. You’ve become a complete non-sexual entity in her eyes, like her brother, or a … Continue reading FRIEND ZONE.
The past two weeks I have learned a lot of things – including that hands and feet occupy the largest area of the brain when it comes to human senses; that’s why when your shoes are hurting your feet from all that dancing or whatever, the pain feels much more unbearable. (I KNOW!!!) Even more … Continue reading GUYS BE WHACK.
Packing is high up on the list of chores that I would 110% rather not do. It features much higher than hanging up washing, and just slightly lower than mopping the floor or putting clean sheets on a super king sized duvet (alone). But fear not, babies, for I am here to guide you through … Continue reading PAMELA PACKS.
I’m sitting in a cute little cafe called Ohh Boy, in the Aminta area of Athens, smiling like a slightly crazed person. I have an iced coconut coffee next to me, a cute dog opposite me, and a bowl of greek yoghurt, fruit and honey to the left of me. Last week I blogged about … Continue reading YES WOMAN: PART DEUX.
A couple of months ago, while I was round at one of my friends apartments for one of our ‘Come Dine With Me’ dinner nights. Catching up, we were all talking about our latest gossip and what we’d been up to, and when it came to my gossip which was distinctly lacking, I made no … Continue reading YES, WOMAN
procrastination prə(ʊ)ˌkrastɪˈneɪʃ(ə)n/ noun the action of delaying or postponing something. “your first tip is to avoid procrastination” Here is a comprehensive list of ways that I have put off revising today, for my impending annual aviation exams taking place on Tuesday, (writing this post too, is yet another method of my procrastination obviously).
Being brave isn’t a word that I’d normally use to describe myself. In fact, I don’t really consider myself brave at all. I’d normally consider myself a low-risk taker, probably because I am an only child and a Virgo (except when it comes to buying trainers – on that note, I’m a bit of a … Continue reading THE LEAP OF FAITH
If honesty is the best policy, then why does the truth so often hurt? And if there is no such thing as a good lie, is there such a thing as being too honest?
It’s lent, and despite being a non-practicing catholic, my inner seven-year-old self (she’s always there) still kind of feels some moral obligation from my catholic education to give something up for Lent, just incase there really is a Heaven when we die. If you don’t know what lent actually entails, it’s a whole forty days … Continue reading ABSTINENCE MAKES THE HEART GROW FONDER
Valentine’s Day is fast approaching and every shop is literally bursting at the seams with red, pink and white. Not one for overtly outright proclamations of love and PDA’s (I am a Virgo after all), I present to you a series of ‘Alternative Valentine’s Day poems’, written by me.
A few weeks ago, I was at Dubai’s tacky somewhat-but-not theme park, Global Village. I won a giant flamingo on some little ducky fishing game (and when I say giant, I mean GIANT), went a ride on the highest swings, and was then happily chomping my way through a chocolate chip ice cream cone dusted with … Continue reading TO MY SEVEN YEAR OLD SELF
On Thursday night, I had a wobbly moment. An albeit brief moment, but a wobbly moment nonetheless. I had a cry on my sofa, then I poured myself a (very large) gin, and I went to bed after about another four of those gins looking like Bridget Jones, only more tragic because I have two cats.
I’ve had a bit of a blogging sabbatical lately. I’ve mainly been preoccupied with a few tasks like reading Sarah Knight’s, “Get Your Sh*t Together” which has me timing how long I take in the shower, (sixteen minutes FYI, and that’s not even on a hair washing day). Nothing that depressing or cringe-worth funny has … Continue reading “I’M SORRY. I CAN’T. DON’T HATE ME.”
If you were to play a word association game, and someone shouted out ‘CHRISTMAS!’, the word most people would probably shout back in return would be, ‘JOY!’ or ‘HAPPINESS!’, however, I am here to argue that this is a common misconception. I mean, you might subliminally know the words to the majority of your Spotify … Continue reading THE HIGHS & LOWS OF CHRISTMAS
A good friend of mine once told me a story about an ex best friend and her who’d had a bitter and upsetting fall out. I don’t know why the story always stuck in my mind – maybe I resonated with it a bit. Either way, we were walking through the train station, when she … Continue reading GIRL GANG
I read an article online about Ed Sheeran ditching his smartphone. The guy just dropped off the grid because he felt like he was spending too much time on social media and seeing the world through a screen. While I really admire him for it, I don’t think I could bear to be parted from … Continue reading TEXTIQUETTE
Does everything happen for a reason? Or is life just a series of coincidences? I was telling a good friend over WhatsApp that due to my low key living at the moment, that I didn’t feel like I had much to write about for my blog just now. She suggested writing a blog ‘on fate … Continue reading FATE
After a good three weeks of looking (and feeling) like garbage, I paid a long overdue visit to Beyoncé of Brows in a bid to make myself feel more like a human again.
Para Pam was a nickname once coined to me by a friend in my very early twenties, around the time my anxiety most likely started, although back then, I didn’t actually know that was what it was.
Being an adult is hard. It really, wasn’t what I signed up for. Not only do I want a refund, but I also want compensation for all the hidden fine clauses, as well as a free emotional support animal who is <unlike my recently adopted pet> a lap cat.