Breakups are harder the older you get, and that’s a fact. Not only do you have to endure the heartache that is missing someone who’s been a huge part of your life for a considerable amount of time, but you’re also grieving for all the hopes, dreams and plans that will never come to fruition. (Better put those imagined baby names on the back burner!) You gave your time and youth to someone who you now have to forget, and unfortunately there is no memory eraser. Eternal Sunshine Of The Spotless Mind was nothing but a fictional movie, and so our only option is to endure. But you are not alone in the battle.
We were sat on a beautiful big balcony, overlooking the sea but I sat there looking down forlornly at the bubbles in my sparkling water. “Is this rock bottom?” I mumbled quietly to my friend.
“I think so…”’ she replied, “But do you know what happens when you reach rock bottom, Pam?”
I continued to focus on the bubbles in the glass in a bid to stop the tears that were threatening to burst their banks at any given moment. I shook my head.
“The only way left to go is, up.”
“January is going to be our year.” I was Skyping with my overseas bestie a couple of days before Hogmanay (that’s what us Scots call New Years Eve by the way). I thought ahead to my January work pattern and felt a tidal wave of giddy wash over mewhen I thought about the two weeks of annual leave that needed filled with some plans. Yeah, this year is going to be the year I travel more and actually have some more adventures, I told her.
Fast forward to the first week of February, and if that first month was a taster for the year ahead, then please tell me that the first month is just a trial run?
It’s foolish to deny the want to be popular. On some level, you want to be popular. It’s okay, everybody does. Everyone wants to be liked and actively seeks validation in belonging to a tribe. Denying it is no use; it’s pure evolution. But the fundamental question to women worldwide should be, which tribe do you want to belong to? The Superficial Squad who value everything materialistic, or the Sincere Tribe who only serve to nurture your best interests?
And no, I do not mean the song by Haddaway, but you can listen to it here if I’ve put you in the mood for it.
“Here, I’ll forward the link to you now, and tell me your score!!!” My flatmate bounded enthusiastically out of the room in search for her phone so she could ping the quizto my inbox. We’d spent the evening gabbing away at the dining room table about “The 5 Love Languages” after she came across it on a podcast. “It’s a book you know.” My other flatmate chipped in. “I’ve got it on my kindle if you want to borrow it.”
Love languages? There are approximately six thousand, five hundred spoken languages in the world, and I had only learned one – how the hell was I supposed to understand five new ones all about L O V E ?
I’ve sat here, in front of my laptop now for forty five minutes. If that’s not a testament to the very subject that I’m trying to write about, then I don’t know what is.
I got an anonymous comment on one of my blogposts. (To see the post in question, click here). Firstly, I am clearly not excelling at this whole blogger-thing – because it must have lay there unnoticed for quite some time, (note to self, must read and pay attention to inbox more frequently), and secondly, I then allowed the feedback to occupy more headspace in my mind than it truly deserved.
To tell you the truth, it bothered me.